After a month of showering my mother with love, her nagging dropped by about 70%. Not because she became a saint. But because she finally felt secure enough to stop begging for proof that I loved her. I will not give you false hope. This experiment worked for me because my mother was fundamentally capable of change, even if she didn't change her personality. But there are situations where showering a parent with love is not healing鈥攊t is dangerous.
I recently conducted an unintentional experiment. For thirty days, I committed to showering my mother with love. Not the performative kind posted on Instagram, but the awkward, mundane, exhausting type. I called every day. I listened without interrupting. I said "thank you" for the meals she made in 1987. I sat in her living room watching her favorite reality TV shows without looking at my phone. after a month of showering my mother with love fix
And that decision鈥攖o love imperfectly, persistently, and without guarantee of return鈥攊s not just a fix for a mother-daughter relationship. After a month of showering my mother with
The resentment I had carried鈥攖he heavy, exhausting backpack of "she should have been better"鈥攈ad dissolved. Not because she apologized (she didn't). But because I finally understood that her inability to love me perfectly was never about me. It was about her limits. I will not give you false hope